


Shouldn't have got on the bus

by confusedsatanist



Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Cliche, Domestic Avengers, Everyone Loves Peter Parker, Field Trip, Flash is a dick, Multi, No underage, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Avengers, Protective Steve Rogers, Protective Tony Stark, Superfamily (Marvel), just for fun, oh my god all the cliche
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 07:12:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17976773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/confusedsatanist/pseuds/confusedsatanist
Summary: It's a field trip au. With a bit of Spideypool and a bit of Superfamily.“Peter here is my favourite intern,” He explained proudly to the group. “The kid has done more for Stark Industries than any of our full-time employees.”Flash raised his hand. “Our tour guide earlier said Peter wasn’t an intern, and Stark Industries don’t take high-school age interns.” He said, only sounding slightly snarky in the face of the world-famous billionaire.Peter has to deal with embarrassing parents, a high school bully, and his disaster of an extended family.He deserves to get paid for this.





	Shouldn't have got on the bus

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I wanted to give this trope a go since I read so many of them. 
> 
> A mixture of the MCU and comics universe, as well as AU. Just go with it.

     “Peter!”

Peter groaned, covering his face with his pillow. He rolled over to stare at the ceiling, covered in glow-in-the-dark stars. If he ignored it, maybe it would go away.

     It did not.

     “Peter, get your ass out here now!” The voice yelled again. Peter lifted his head blearily from the pillow.

     “Coming!”

 

A couple minutes later, dressed hastily in a hoodie and jeans, Peter wandered into the kitchen, to be met with a sea of faces turned his way. Their emotions ranged from highly amused to mildly baffled. The only one who seemed annoyed, however, was Tony Stark, who was currently staring at the teenager, a piece of paper clutched in his fist.

     “Were you gonna tell me about the trip, kid?” Tony asked. Peter shrugged. He moved over to the counter, opening several cupboards before he found a slightly-crushed box of frosted flakes. He poured himself a bowl, painfully aware of the silence in the kitchen.

     “I mean, it seems kinda pointless?” He said. “I could just stay in bed all day instead…?”

Clint and Steve, who had been holding in their laughter, shared smiles of utter glee. Peter glanced between them suspiciously. “Look, there’s really no point, I’m just going to head off…”

     Tony snagged his backpack and hauled the retreating teenager backwards. Peter yelped as Tony shoved the form into his hands. “Not a chance. I better see you later, kid.”

     Natasha snorted into her coffee.

 

\--

 

Peter didn’t exactly have a normal life.

     He hadn’t, since he was fourteen and an ill-fated trip to Oscorp had left him with genetic mutations and a small, fang-shaped scar on the back of his neck.

     At least then life had mostly carried on like normal for a few weeks, weird powers aside. Then Uncle Ben had died, and Spider-Man was born.

     Needless to say, things went downhill from there.

     Aunt May, unable to cope with the responsibility of caring for the teenager by herself, had sent Peter away, to live with his godfather and father’s closest friend, Tony Stark. The lifestyle change had been jarring at first, but Peter had gotten used to his new family over the next year or so. When Tony and Steve became Peter’s legal guardians, it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

     Not long after that, Peter had told the heroes about his alter-ego, and after a rough couple of weeks, he’d gained his fathers’ acceptance and a new super-suit.

     Now, Peter was eighteen, having found a comfortable balance between masquerading as Spider-Man and keeping his grades up (because god forbid Tony Stark’s son be anything less than a genius), with a host of bizarre and mildly dangerous family members surrounding him at all times.

     He lived at the Avengers Compound upstate, making the drive to school every day in his Aunt’s old mini. Tony hated that car, but Peter refused to let his Dad buy him a new one.

     Peter didn’t exactly have a normal life.

 

\--

 

Mr Harrington looked more than a little tired as he herded the group of teenagers onto the battered and disgusting bus. Thankfully for Peter, this meant that the teacher didn’t give a second glance to the signature written on the bottom of his form.

     Technically, no one knew that Tony Stark was Peter’s guardian. On his emergency contact forms at school, Tony had ensured that his real name wasn’t on them, in case any less-than-honest receptionist sold Iron Man’s personal mobile number to the media or worse. The same went for Steve, who’d insisted his number was added to the forms. That had been a weird conversation, Peter thought with a smile as he got on the bus, followed closely by Ned and MJ.

     The three friends sat down together, Ned and MJ muttering excitedly about what awaited them at the Avengers Compound. Peter was less enthused.

     “Do you think we’ll meet any of the Avengers?” A voice from the row behind them could be heard saying excitedly. Peter buried his face in his hands.

     “God, I hope not.”

     “Why’s that, Penis?” Someone else exclaimed loudly. Peter prayed the ground would swallow him whole, but to no avail. The smug face of Flash Thompson appeared in his periphery. “Afraid they’re gonna call you out on your bullshit lies? ‘Mr. Stark’s internship’ my ass. Next, you’ll tell me you know every Avenger personally, huh? They’re your best friends?”

     Peter looked away, trying to ignore him, and Flash flicked his ear painfully. “Answer me, weirdo.”

     “Of course I don’t.” Peter said stiffly. “I’m just an intern. That would be stupid.”

     Peter was lying through his teeth, and he knew it. He knew every single resident of the compound, and some who only dropped in every so often, would contest that point fiercely. Still, Peter would rather keep that knowledge to himself than give Flash more ammunition than he already had.

     “Whatever. I can’t wait to see your face when they don’t even let you into the building.” Flash muttered, retreating back to his seat. Ned nudged Peter’s shoulder gently, and gave his friend a quiet smile, as they pulled up at the impressive building.

 

\--

 

There are some people Tony is always pleased to see. People he’d never get sick of turning up on his doorstep, or in his lab, unexpectedly. The trio currently in front of him, however, were not those people. He could not have wanted this less. Tony sighed heavily and raised a brow. “Try again, from the beginning. No lying this time.” He said.

     Deadpool opened his mouth, to start talking, but Steven Strange stepped in before the other man could say a word.

     “I found these two outside Peter’s window. They won’t tell me why they were there and- just- you know what happens when Peter hangs out with both of them.” Strange finished, looking exasperated. Wade was openly grinning, but Loki’s face remained void of emotion, save a raised eyebrow.

     ‘What were you guys planning on dragging my kid into this time?” Tony said.

     “We’ve missed him, metalhead. And we were both in town, so we thought—” Tony cut Wade off.

     “You realise he’s a teenager. He has a life outside of being an Avenger, and he has grades he promised me he’d maintain. Peter is in school!”

    “ _Boss, Peter just scanned into the building.”_

Tony sighed. “Helpful, Friday, very helpful.” He turned to Strange. “I gotta go keep the rest of the team out of trouble. Chuck these idiots out somewhere. And if Loki’s about, Thor won’t be hard to find. _Keep the Asgardians away from my lab._ ”

 

\--

 

Peter trailed slightly behind his class, preparing himself for the worst. The receptionist, Lisa, was handing the teenagers temporary key cards. Even MJ and Ned, who were over for weekend stays fairly often, were still only allowed low-level passes.

     “There are ten levels of pass,” Lisa explained. “1 being the lowest, for guests that have to be accompanied at all times. That’s you lot. Levels 2 and 3 are for guests with more access. Level 4 is for interns who have to have permission to enter labs. Levels 5 and 6 for part-time and full-time employees. Levels 7 and 8 are for the Avengers, level 8 for the ones that live in the compound. Level 9 is for the CEO, Ms. Potts, and close family of Tony Stark, including Steve Rogers. Level 10 is for those with all-access.” She paused. “I’m not sure whether this is classified information, but only four people have ever had level 10 passes, one of them being Stark himself. No one but those four have unadulterated permission to access Tony Stark’s private lab. It’s where he builds the Avengers’ classified equipment.” Peter knew all this already. He, Bruce and Tony were the only ones with access to that lab, although he was the one to usually get loaded with the task of having to clean up after the three’s disastrous experiments. Shuri technically had a level 7 pass but would occasionally be given a temporary level 10 pass. To Steve’s constant chagrin, he had yet to be given a level 10 pass, something Peter found thoroughly amusing.

     He suddenly realized that he probably should’ve gotten a fake pass for the day. People started filing through the barrier, and he clutched his keycard anxiously. The barrier opened for him without him even having to scan in.

     “ _Welcome home, Peter. Steve has requested I inform you that it was Bucky that broke the waffle-maker, not him. Tony has asked me to inform you that you still have restricted access from his lab. Wanda has asked me to inform you that she, Hope, and Natasha have decided on ‘Sixteen candles’ for movie night.”_ The AI paused. _“Restricted access, Peter. Tony was adamant about it.”_

Peter went scarlet.

     “Uh, thanks, Friday.” He said, painfully aware that his class was staring at him, utterly baffled. Peter flushed. The restricted access thing had a simple explanation; he and the princess of Wakanda may’ve accidentally messed up the formula for a new web fluid, and it may’ve accidentally exploded half of Tony’s prototypes, causing him to kick them both out and ban them- PERMANENTLY- from his lab. Not that either of the teenagers actually _listened_ to the warnings, but that was irrelevant. Whether or not Dr. Banner snuck them the passcode was none of their business.

     Okay, so maybe it wasn’t an explanation he could give to his peers. MJ, who’d heard the story through Shuri, cracked a slight smile. Despite the warning, Peter was allowed through. He tried to ignore the triumphant look Flash was giving his friends.

     “Hi everyone! I’m Ellie, I’ll be your tour guide for the day!” A woman said brightly, ushering the class forwards. Ellie was only a few years older than Peter, in her last year of college. She and Peter had become fairly good friends, as they had similar interests and were both often tasked with taking care of the Avengers equipment. After several all-nighters with the woman, Peter liked her so much that he’d asked Tony to guarantee her a position at the compound after college. “Now, before we get going, does anyone have any questions?”

     “Uh, yeah.” Flash said smugly. “Is Parker actually an intern here? Because I read that you only take college-level interns, and only five a year?”

     Ellie looked baffled. “Of course he’s not!” She said. “Peter hasn’t been an intern here for years now!”

     Peter knew Ellie meant well, but he’d never wanted to disappear quite as much as he did in that moment. He could feel Flash’s smug stare on his back and curled into himself.

     They walked through the hallways for a minute, Ellie giving a run-down of the layout of the labs. Peter wasn’t really listening, figuring if he missed something he didn’t already know he could just ask literally anyone in the building. Or ask her to give him another tour.

     “Just through here, Ladies and Gentlemen, is the Avenger’s personal garage. If you would follow me.” Ellie ushered them into the garage, Peter’s classmates looking around in awe at the fancy vehicles surrounding them.

     “This is Captain America’s motorbike.” Ellie began, “In storage since the forties, it was painstakingly restored by Stark himself, when the Captain was discovered in the ice. It is the Captain’s vehicle of choice and it’s not uncommon to see him riding around the area with his shield strapped to the front.”

     “Can we touch it?” Someone piped up. Ellie shook her head, and there were a few disappointed whispers.

     “These cars are all Tony Stark’s,” Ellie continued, gesturing to the row of fancy convertibles, before turning towards the more average, rundown vehicles. “And these belong to the rest of the Avengers. Although they look ordinary, all of these cars and bikes are outfitted with access to Stark’s AI, and high-tech defense mechanisms. I would advise against touching any of them.”

     Peter could feel the car keys in his back pocket, looking at his own car sat between Clint’s pickup and Natasha’s Harley-Davidson. He’d had driving lessons at some point from every Avenger, with the exception of Wanda. She was only a few years older than him and had never learnt how. He hoped none of his classmates recognized his car, as explaining why it was in the Avengers’ private garage would be difficult.

     They passed through the garage, everyone looking closely at the cars. Peter hoped he hadn’t left any ID visible in his car. Or any fast food wrappers.

     After everyone had finished questioning why there was a green motorcycle chained to the wall – It was Loki’s, confiscated after Stark had been concerned for the safety of his Avengers (see: Loki let Peter have a ride and Tony did not approve) – they finally moved out of the garage and towards the rest of the compound.

 

     Peter and the group followed Ellie down a hall, before they were stopped. Peter, at the back of the group, didn’t see who it was, but immediately recognised the voice. “If you would come right this way, everyone. I’ll be taking over the tour through the Avengers’ quarters. Normally, we would never allow tour groups to pass through here, but the other route is currently out of commission due to construction work. I ask you to be respectful, this is their home.”

     Peter stood on his tiptoes and made eye contact with Pepper Potts, his pseudo-mom. She gave him a bright grin, her fake smile becoming real. “Peter!” She said. Perfectly on cue, there was a loud crash from behind the door Pepper had just stepped out of.

     The door opened to reveal a slightly frazzled looking Sam. He grimaced at the sight of the baffled teenagers. “Sorry to interrupt, Pepper. I thought we heard you say that Peter was home. I wanted to challenge the twerp to a Smash Bros rematch.” There was another crash, and a loud ‘motherFUCKER’, followed by a sarcastic chorus of ‘language!’. Sam glanced back anxiously. “I gotta go clean up this mess. See ya later, kids.”

     Ned leaned backwards to hiss in Peter’s ear over the mumbles of their classmates. “Was that Captain America’s voice?”

     “Yup. I think he’s trying to fix the waffle maker.” Peter sighed. Pepper beckoned the group forwards, and Peter regretfully passed the Avengers’ kitchen, wishing he could sneak away from the tour group to join the team.

      Pepper led them all into the training room, and Peter could barely repress his groan. He spent hours in that room every week, and he definitely didn’t need a tour. In fact, he could give a better tour, called ‘things I’ve accidentally broken and weapons I’ve been beat up with’.

     In the corner, Natasha, Wanda and Scott were sparring. Everyone watched in amazement as Scott seemingly vanished into thin air, before reappearing again in a different place a few seconds later, knocking Natasha off her feet. The woman landed gracefully, though, immediately flipping upright again. Wanda’s hands sparked with energy, but she relaxed when she spotted the tour group. The others did the same.

     The three walked over, Scott reaching out to fist-bump Peter on his way past. Natasha raised an eyebrow, taking in the way Peter shifted to the back of the crowd, or the way numerous people shot the teenager unkind glances. She felt a rush of protectiveness, especially when she saw one of the little prats lean over to whisper in Peter’s ear.

     “Hey Penis, how are you gonna talk your way out of this one?” Flash whispered. Peter hunched his shoulders, praying that the bully wouldn’t embarrass him in front of his family. Flash smirked and folded his arms.

     “Now, ladies and gentlemen.” Scott began. “You probably think our ability to win every fight is a matter of superpowers and technology. You… would be correct. However, we also put in hours of training every day to stay battle ready. Our training is tailored to our specific skillset. For example,” Scott gestured to the metal poles spanning the high ceiling. They looked similar to monkey-bars but varied in thicknesses and heights. “When Spider-Man moved in, Stark built in this, enabling the hero to use his more specific skills in the safety of the training room.” Scott chuckled. “The Avengers that can fly also tend to perch up there a lot. I once found Bucky up there. Not entirely sure _how_ he managed that one…” Scott faded off, trying to puzzle it out in his mind. Natasha stepped forwards, pressing a quick kiss to Pepper’s cheek and addressing the students.

     “It would be too dangerous to allow you to use our weapons, or spar with any of us. In fact, I’ve only ever met one kid your age who can match any of us in a fight.” She winked at Peter, whose eyes widened. “So, instead, you’re going to move through here and towards the labs.”

     Pepper spoke up. “I’d like to remind you all that the area you’ll be passing is the Avengers’ living space. Please be respectful of their privacy and remember they’re technically very dangerous individuals.” She glanced at Wanda, then at Peter. “Especially the teenagers.”

     They passed through the training room, and through hallways and flights of stairs that Peter knew like the back of his hand. As they walked down the hallways, Peter was jerked backwards by a hand on his collar. Before he knew it, he was shoved against a wall, Flash smirking down at him menacingly.

     “What—” He gasped out, winded, “Is your problem, Flash?”

     “You think you’re so special just because an Avenger looked at you?” Flash spat. “In case you’ve forgotten, _Penis,_ you’re still just a nerdy nobody.”

     Flash released him, but before Peter could catch his breath, a fist hit him in the jawbone. By the time he recovered, Flash had followed the group and disappeared. Peter, too concerned about catching up with the tour group to worry about the bruise blooming across his jaw, hurried forwards.

     He caught up with the group just as they walked past his bedroom door. His _slightly open_ bedroom door. A few people peered around the door, and the whispering grew so loud that Pepper paused. She laughed when she saw what they were whispering about.

     “That would be Spider-Man’s bedroom.” Pepper said. The whispers grew excited. “He does value his privacy, as one of the few Avengers who hasn’t revealed his identity to the public. I’d advise against intruding.” She asked Friday to shut the door, and it slammed shut, with the click of a lock falling into place.

     “Tell us about Spider-Man!” Someone said. Pepper glanced at Peter, who smiled.

     “Spider-Man moved here with the rest of the Avengers after Tony Stark sold Avengers Tower, although he was not publicly an Avenger at this time. He still spends a large amount of his time in Hell’s Kitchen, where he works with the Daredevil, and of course in Queens, his hometown and the area of the city he regularly patrols. He and Stark conducted a few experiments, concluding that he can lift up to 10 tons without issue. He doesn’t need his costume to stick to walls, but his web-shooters are of his own invention. He’s also the favourite superhero of every single Avenger, although Spider-Man’s favourite superhero is Captain America.” Pepper glanced at Peter, taking note of his red-tinged ears.

     “Why’s there a Star Wars poster in his room?” Betty asked loudly. Peter sighed inwardly.

     “I would like to say that Spider-Man is our resident nerd,” Pepper began with a sigh, “But Tony built himself a fully functioning sonic screwdriver, and Falcon’s video game collection is a force to be reckoned with.” She laughed.

     “How come Spider-Man lives in the compound? I thought he lived in Queens?”

     “I can’t say much without revealing too much about his personal life, but we’re his family, as much as he is ours. Thankfully, the commute to the city is only about 10 minutes on the jet, and about an hour by car, and Spider-Man knows that Tony Stark would probably buy back the tower for him if he asked nicely.” She shot Peter a wink, and he ducked his head sheepishly.

     The tour group carried on, still muttering about Spider-Man. Peter waited for them to turn the corner, before slipping into his room. The door knob scanned his finger-prints, and the door opened easily for him. There was still a mattress on the floor from the last time Wade had stayed over, complete with burrito crumbs and, as he discovered previously, a glock under the pillow. How Wade had managed to leave his firearms everywhere, he didn’t know, but Peter was impressed.

     He grabbed his phone from where it had been charging on his desk, and rushed off to catch up with the class, making sure to firmly close his door.

 

Eventually, they made it to one of the public labs. Peter knew that Bruce would be working in there at that time and was surprised when the tour group was allowed in, as Bruce normally didn’t let people disturb him whilst he was working. He was even more surprised when he saw the back of a very familiar head.

     He hadn’t known his best friend was in the country.

     Bruce introduced himself to the group as Doctor Banner, giving a brief mention of how he worked closely with the Avengers and failing to mention how he _was_ an Avenger. Peter raised a brow. Bruce Banner was as much a part of the team as the Hulk was, and Peter made a mental note to remind the man of that later.

     Shuri, on the other hand, didn’t even turn around until Bruce asked her to introduce herself. She instantly caught Peter’s eye, and thoroughly enjoyed totally ignoring his pleading look. “I’m Shuri, technology and research leader of Wakanda. And I’m a Princess, but that’s boring.” She shrugged, glancing between the tour group’s mildly stunned faces. “Anyway, who wants to hear about the time Peter and Bucky got stuck in—”

     “Shuri, why don’t you tell the group what you’re working on?” Pepper interrupted, and Peter breathed a sigh of relief. Shuri looked disappointed but grabbed the object she had been studying anyway. His class shot him confused glances, but the focus quickly shifted from Shuri knowing his name to the technology in her hand.

     “So, Spider-Man and I were talking, and we were wondering about the possibility of integrating Wakandan technology with P- uh, Spider-Man’s original tech. Tony greenlit the project, because he thinks it’ll make the Spidey-suit safer. He’s probably wrong about that, knowing Spider-Man and his ability to find trouble literally everywhere. It’s quite impressive. Anyway, here’s a prototype I was working on.” Shuri held up the object smugly. Most of the students had no idea what they were looking at, but Peter knew. He’d helped build it, after all. It was a web-shooter that had been ripped from one of his old suits and modified. He knew it like the back of his hand. That meant he also saw what was about to happen before anyone else did.

     “Uh, Shuri?” He said, Spidey-sense flaring up.

     “Yeah, Pete?” She said, still fiddling with the machinery.

     “You might want to—”

     It exploded into flames. Peter, acting on instinct, shoved the princess out of the way, and caught the burning metal in his hands. Before any pain set in, he tossed it in a perfect arc, where it landed in the fire-proof trashcan, a feature Tony had added after one-too-many exploding experiments. Shuri, from where she’d been thrown to the floor, let out a surprised laugh, standing up. Peter had pushed her out the way before she could be hurt, and she was totally unharmed aside from damaged pride.

     “I was not expecting that!” She said, sounding far too excited. “The web fluid reacted with the raw vibranium! I wonder if this happens when the webs interact with Cap’s shield?”

     Bruce helped Peter to his feet, checking his hands gently. The palms were red and raw, but nowhere near as damaged as they should’ve been. Peter tugged his sleeves down over his hands and prayed none of his classmates asked questions. The burns would be gone in a couple of hours anyway.

     None of them did, surprisingly. A few of them were staring at him, but no one questioned it. Pepper ran a hand through his hair gently, but the rest of the tour group, including Mr. Harrington, were watching in surprised silence as Shuri was half inside the trashcan, digging for the now-extinguished prototype.

     She pulled it out with a triumphant yell, before dropping it with a yelp. It clattered to the floor, and she glanced at the group sheepishly. “It’s still hot.”

     “Let me show you some of the older super-suits.” Bruce said, after everyone had settled down. As Bruce talked through the original Iron Man suit, Peter suddenly became aware that someone was stood behind him. He whirled around, finding himself face-to-face with Clint, who’d just dropped down from an open vent. The Avenger grinned, and leaned forwards, towards Peter. They did a quick handshake, one they’d come up with the very first time they’d ever met, laughing quietly.

     “I’m trying to find my hearing aids, Nat stole them.” Clint began in a hushed voice. “Also, Thor.”

     “ _He’s on earth_?” Peter signed, surprised.

     “Loki is. And if Loki’s here, Thor generally is too. Just, let me know if you see him.” Clint said, and hesitated. “I thought Thor would’ve attached himself to Banner by now. The guy’s like a lost puppy, it’s hilarious. Loki’s supposedly being watched by Strange, but he’ll probably turn up at some point. The guy’s weirdly slippery.”

     Peter and Clint followed Peter’s class for a moment, before the group noticed the presence of Hawkeye.

     “Oh my god it’s actually him!”

     “Hawkeye, can I get an autograph?”

     “It’s an actual Avenger!”

     Peter translated a few of the things he knew Clint wouldn’t have been able to lip-read, and the man laughed. He pat Peter on the shoulder and waved at the rest of the class.

     “You seen Wade yet, Pete?” He asked the boy.

     “ _I thought he was out all day?”_ He asked, knowing none of his classmates knew ASL. “ _On a mission with SHIELD, last I knew. Dad kicked him out the other day.”_

     “He got back earlier, wanted to talk to you. You know no one can keep Wade away from you.” Clint said. “Now, I gotta go track down an Asgardian.” With that, he disappeared back into the vent.

     Peter really, really hoped Wade didn’t find him. He was more than fine with his classmates not knowing he lived with the Avengers, let alone that he was dating a superhero. That was too few steps away from them finding out he _was_ an Avenger.

     “Oh, and Pete?” Clint popped his head out of the vents. “Good luck.”

    

\--

 

“You see the kid’s jaw?” Clint asked Natasha. “Pretty nasty bruise. Wonder what happened.”

     She frowned. “Peter wasn’t bruised when I saw him.”

     Steve and Bucky, sat on the sofa nearby, looked up. Steve’s brow was furrowed, and he looked worried. Bucky had immediately understood, and he looked quietly livid.

     “Friday,” Natasha asked. ‘Did you see any unusual behaviour from Pete? Or how he got bruised?”

     Friday was silent for a moment. “Pulling up the footage now, Miss Romanoff. Peter asked that I not show Boss or the Captain, but I think it best you see this.”

     The four Avengers in the room watched the footage of Peter getting punched in the face in deadly silence. Steve was the angriest, Peter being his son. He stood up stiffly.

     “I gotta go talk to Tony.” He said quietly. The others pretended not to notice when Steve wiped his eyes hurriedly as he waked out. Bucky was the next to stand up.

     “Need to find my guns.’ He said gruffly. Natasha and Clint followed soon after.

 

\--

 

Loki watched the footage back with a stony face.

     “M’kay, so are you feeling up for some murdering? Because I _really_ am.” Wade said. Loki could hear from his voice that the merc was barely restraining his anger. He felt similar.

     “Perhaps our plans will have to change.” He said. “I doubt the Avengers will give that boy quite what he has coming.”

     “You’re speaking my language, horn-head! Let’s go unalive a teenager, then take Spidey-babe out for tacos.”

 

\--

 

Shuri caught up to the tour group as they were reaching one of Tony’s labs. She grabbed Peter by the wrist, and MJ, spotting the other girl, also lagged behind.

     “Thanks for earlier, Peter.” Shuri said. “Sometimes I forget the really obvious things. That’s what you’re here for. And, y’know, you can be smart. Sometimes.” She said. MJ snorted.

     “It’s no problem, Shuri. Next time, though, wait until I’m there before messing with the web fluid. Not even Dad knows the exact formula.”

     “I’ll figure it out one day, web-face.” She grumbled.

     MJ leaned forwards to give Shuri a quick peck on the cheek. Shuri flushed, and MJ dragged Peter away, cackling.

 

When the tour group walked into the lab, Tony Stark was talking in a hushed voice to Captain America, both looking extremely worried. The men spotted the tour group, and Steve excused himself, giving Peter a long, indecipherable look before walking through the door into the living room. Tony looked tense, something Peter had learned to notice in his dad over the few years he’d lived with them.

     “Come this way, everyone,” Pepper ushered the group towards one side of the room, where a few of the scientists were ready to show the students their work. Whilst everyone was distracted, Tony pulled Peter and Pepper to the side. His hand hovered over the bruise, concern evident in his eyes.

     “Why didn’t you tell me people were doing this to you, kid?” Tony said softly. Peter looked at the floor.

     From the other side of the room, a loud grating voice exclaimed, “Penis Parker’s gonna get thrown out by Tony Stark!”

     Tony stiffened. Peter looked up at his dad with pleading eyes. “Please don’t do anything. I don’t want him to—”

     “How long, Peter?” Tony said. “Has that boy been bullying you?”

     “I don’t know, since middle school? When I was still living with May, before the bite.” Peter said with a shrug. “But I heal fast, and it doesn’t bother me anymore, it’s fine, dad.”

     Tony gave Peter a brief hug. “Okay, ‘intern’,” He said softly. “Help me with the presentation to your class?”

     “Sure—”

     The door burst open, and two men barrelled in, arguing loudly. It took Peter a moment to recognise them; Sam and Bucky, the latter carrying a large machine gun. They made a beeline for Peter, Bucky pushing past Flash a little rougher than necessary. Sam grabbed Peter by the shoulders.

     “Pete.” Sam said sombrely. “This complete dick,” With a deadpan look at Bucky, who shrugged, “Says milk goes BEFORE cereal! I mean what sort of psychopath thinks that’s even remotely normal! What the shit!”

     Peter studied Bucky. He’d definitely watched the super-soldier make a bowl of lucky charms that morning, and Buck did _not_ put milk before cereal. The man smirked, and Peter grinned at Sam, before glancing at the slightly ajar door to the living room.

     Steve could definitely hear them.

     “Y’know,” Peter said loudly, feigning a thoughtful tone, “This wouldn’t be an issue if we could just have _waffles_ for breakfast instead, but _someone_ broke the waffle-maker.”

     Bucky, Sam and Tony, surrounding Peter, collapsed into barely concealed giggles. From the other room, a faint ‘ _screw you, Pete!’_ could be heard.

    Peter’s classmates and teacher were watching the exchange in surprise, and Tony caught on quickly, tossing an arm across Peter’s shoulders.

     “Peter here is my favourite intern,” He explained proudly to the group. “The kid has done more for Stark Industries than any of our full-time employees.”

     Flash raised his hand. “Our tour guide earlier said Peter wasn’t an intern, and Stark Industries don’t take high-school age interns.” He said, only sounding slightly snarky in the face of the world-famous billionaire.

     “Likely because Peter’s much more than an intern here, even though it’s his official job.” Tony paused. “We made an exception for this kid, because he’s the embodiment of what my company tries to be. Unlike you, by the looks of it.” Flash paled and dropped his hand. Peter blushed and pretended he couldn’t hear his Pops laughing from the living room. “While you’re here, before your lunch break, any other questions?”

      “Who’s your favourite Avenger?” Someone asked.

     “Spider-Man, next.”

     “Have you got any funny stories about the Avengers?” Betty asked shyly. Sam cut in at that point with a triumphant grin.

     “I’ve got a great one.” He began. Both Bucky and Peter’s eyes widened. “About everyone’s favourite Spider-Man, and the wonderful Bucky Barnes. I also have a video of this one, and you can all find it on YouTube no problem. I highly recommend you do. Anyway.” He cleared his throat dramatically. “They both took the day off in New York, and our two heroes came across a little girl, crying because her cat was stuck in a tree! Being the dumbasses that they are, they decided the only way to retrieve the cat would be for _both of them_ to _climb_ the tree, which they failed spectacularly. They got so stuck—” Here Sam had to pause, giggling uncontrollably. Bucky gave him a death glare. “They got so stuck in Spider-Man’s webs, the NYFD had to leave them there for almost _two hours,_ because they didn’t know how to remove the webbing! In the end, Stark had to cut them free!”

     Most of Peter’s classmates were giggling at the story. Bucky’s stony face did a good job at quelling the laughs, though, and eventually Tony cleared his throat. “Any more questions?”

     “Did you make Ms. Potts CEO because you’re dating her?” A snarky voice asked. Peter recognised him as one of Flash’s friends. Tony simply raised an eyebrow.

     “I made Pepper CEO because there’s no one more well-suited to the job.” He replied honestly. “Also, if Pepper and I are dating, someone should tell that to her wife. Next?”

     “Who’s the youngest Avenger?”

     “I’m afraid I can’t tell you, but I can tell you that our youngest hero, now 18, started this gig when they were 14.” Tony paused for a moment. “And we couldn’t be prouder. Although I recommend none of you seek out superpowers, at any age. Leave it to the Avengers.”

     “And that’s time, everyone. If you would follow me to the canteen, you can have your lunch break.” Pepper said, herding the teenagers through the door.

 

They headed to the intern’s canteen, much to Peter’s relief. Not that he expected his class to even be allowed near the Avenger’s dining room, he wouldn’t put it past his trouble-seeking family to organise that. Peter, sat between Ned and MJ as everyone began fishing their lunches out of their bags, relaxed in his seat.

     Then he realised he’d forgotten his lunch.

     “I’ll be right back!” He told his friends, manoeuvring between tables.

     “Peter, where are you going?” Mr. Harrington asked. Peter paused, thinking on his feet.

     “Uh, toilet?”

     “The toilets are the other way, Peter.”

     “Right. Sorry.”

     Cursing mentally, Peter walked off to the other side of the canteen, taking the long route around, through hallways and up and down a couple flights of stairs. When he reached the door, he opened it slowly, not knowing who was in the room.

     The door slid open to reveal a large, comfortable-looking kitchen and dining room. It would’ve looked perfectly ordinary and domestic, decorated tastefully and with soft, warm lighting, if not for the obvious anomalies.

     For starters, the dining table looked to seat about twenty, with benches instead of chairs. On the counter was the mangled remains of what Peter took to be the waffle-maker, and the handle of the fridge was hanging by a single screw, no doubt from when someone with super-strength had shut the door too hard. The fruit bowl in the middle of the table currently held, aside from an excess of plums, a battered Iron Man helmet, a grenade, and a whole peeled banana. Peter wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know why.

     Through a small archway was the living room, where Peter could hear the familiar sounds of Smash Bros, meaning at the very least, Sam was around. Vision was sat at the dining table, staring intensely at someone’s abandoned phone. The cloak of levitation was hovering nearby, and Peter couldn’t help but grin when he saw it.

     Peter opened the fridge, careful not to disrupt the precarious handle, in case he was blamed for breaking it, and surveyed the contents. He pushed aside Tony’s half-eaten tuna sandwich, and the left-over curry that Clint had made the team the previous night. He sighed as he pulled an ancient-looking war-hammer off of the top shelf, placing it on the table behind him. At the very back of the fridge was a small box, labelled ‘Peter’. He grabbed it and slammed the fridge shut without thinking. The handle fell off with an appropriately dramatic clatter. Before anyone could catch him in the kitchen, Peter webbed the cookie jar, catching it when he pulled it off of the top of the cupboard. He stuffed a couple of cookies in his pocket, and carefully placed the jar on the counter.

     What was the point of trying to hide the cookie jar when you live with a bunch of super-humans, Peter thought with a sigh.

     He retreated from the kitchen, careful not to disturb Vision, and returned to the canteen.

 

“What did you get?” Ned asked eagerly. Peter narrowed his eyes at the innocent-looking Tupperware, before deciding that his Spidey-sense would’ve alerted him if it was threatening.

     He took the lid off cautiously, breathing a sigh of relief at the sight of his ordinary cheese sandwich. “Pops must’ve made my lunch this morning.” He said. “He’s the only one that doesn’t mess with it.”

     Ned shuddered. ‘Remember when there were flies in your sandwich?”

     “My family think they’re hilarious.” Peter said, deadpan. Then he lifted up the top of his sandwich, quickly checking the insides. “We’re fly free.” He said with a sigh of relief. MJ stopped eating for a moment to stare at him.

     “Your family are weird as shit, dude.” She said, raising an eyebrow. Peter shrugged, and Ned nodded vigorously.

    

Suddenly, there was a loud crash, and Peter looked up to see Loki Laufeyson lying on the table in front of him, having fallen through a portal. The Norse god groaned slightly and tilted his head to look Peter in the eyes.

     “I was looking for you!”  He exclaimed, before Stephen Strange grabbed him by the collar and hauled him off his feet. The cafeteria watched in stunned silence as Loki winked at Peter, took a bite of the cheese sandwich he’d somehow grabbed, and vanished into thin air.

     “Aw, my lunch.”

     Strange sighed, pinching his nose. “Please tell me.” He said, exasperated, “That I didn’t just lose Loki?”

     He looked up at Peter, who shrugged. “Sorry, Stephen. Can you get my sandwich back?”

     “Your goddamn father.” Strange said, defeated, “Is going to kill me.”

     He disappeared into a shower of orange sparks, leaving the canteen utterly silent. Most of the interns and workers had carried on as if nothing had happened, but the students were frozen. Ellie, the tour guide from earlier, stood up and clapped her hands together.

     “If I could have your attention please, Midtown! I know that seemed a little scary, but I can assure you it’s nothing out of the ordinary here. This place is the home of the Earth’s mightiest heroes, after all! You have ten more minutes to finish your lunch, and then we’ll be continuing our tour.”

     There was a tap on Peter’s shoulder, and he turned with a start, only to see there was no one there, just a few green sparks hanging in the air. He turned back, to catch sight of Flash snickering at him.

     Peter was thankful that none of the Avengers he’d encountered so far had embarrassed him too much.

 

The next stage of the tour took them to the Avengers Museum; technically, it started as nothing but a storage room where Tony kept all of their old suits, but when tour groups started being allowed in, he had turned it into a display.

     Peter had only ever momentarily been in the museum, having worked on most of the suits and therefore having little interest in looking at them. His classmates, though, were excitedly chattering, pointing out the suits of their favourite heroes. Peter wandered around for a moment, before stopping in his tracks at the sight of a very familiar suit.

     His suit.

     More accurately, the first Spider-Man suit that Tony had ever made him, after discovering his secret. Peter was touched to see the suit stood in pride of place between the original Captain America suit, and the mark II Iron Man suit. He pressed his fingers to the glass, a small bio of Spider-Man appearing.

 

_The Amazing Spider-Man._

_Full name: unknown_

_Age: unknown_

_Mutate_

_This Queens-based hero has made a great impact on the world in the past few years. First emerging through YouTube clips and reports of small-time crimes being prevented, the hero eventually caught the attention of Tony Stark, and has since aided the Avengers in missions._

_He gained official status as an Avenger two years ago, after his role in the Infinity War. Spider-Man remains the only Avenger who has never killed another living being and prides himself on a strict moral code. He’s one of the few modern heroes to keep his true identity a secret. Spider-Man is widely considered the most loyal Avenger, and is one of the strongest, next to Thor and The Hulk. He’s the perfect example of what it means to be a hero._

_We’re proud of you, son._

Peter stepped back, blinking rapidly. He stared at the message with wide eyes for a moment, before Flash shoved him out of the way.

     “Bet this is the closest you’ve ever been to the real Spider-Man, huh, Penis.” Flash said. “Move, I want a picture with the suit.”

     Peter moved without a word, still touched by the message. He continued his walk through winding corridors, pausing in front of the case that held Deadpool’s suit. The mannequin that held the suit was crouched mid-superhero pose. Peter stared at it for a moment.

     “Wade, I know that’s you.”

     The suit relaxed, and Peter could feel the grin through the red mask. “Yeah, no shit.” Wade said, standing up and scratching the back of his neck. “Can you unlock the case? I didn’t think this through and I got stuck.”

     Peter obliged, giving Wade a long-suffering look, and before he knew it he had a mercenary following him around like a lost puppy, and a bunch of very confused classmates.

     “Uh, Pete.” Ned said slowly. “Deadpool’s stood behind you.”

     The few classmates that were nearby approached, looking excited but understandably apprehensive. Peter mentally cursed, realising this was going to be a little more difficult to explain than his usual internship excuse.

     As Peter was lost in thought, he didn’t notice the merc moving closer until Wade dropped his chin on top of Peter’s head. “Is this your class?” He asked. Peter knew Wade was looking at his classmates suspiciously, probably feeling a little paranoid, so he stepped to the side, letting his wrist subtly brush against Wade’s hand.

     “Yeah, they are. You’ve met Ned and MJ, right?” He said softly. Wade tilted his head for a moment, then nodded.

     “White said we have, yeah.” He replied, fondly. “You kids are cool.”

     The rest of Peter’s class, including Emily and Mr. Harrington, who were talking amicably, rounded the corner. They stopped short at the sight of Wade, who also froze. Emily frowned, and Wade gave her a quick salute, marred only by the fact that he was holding a handgun.

     “Mr. Wilson.” Emily said cautiously.

     “Last time I checked.” Wade replied. “You’re looking wonderful, Em.”

     “You’re supposed to be under the supervision of Dr. Strange.”

     “Eh, he was boring. I wanted to come and see my favourite tour guide!”

     “We’ve met once, Mr. Wilson.” Emily said, sounding amused. “And that was only through Spider-Man.” 

     “I’ll be honest, I was looking for the web-head. I left my favourite gun in his bedroom… I’ll be on my way now DONTTELLSTARKORROGERSIWASHERETHANKYOUSEEYA!”

     Wade dashed out of the room, winking at Peter before he flung himself out of the window. Peter sighed, and shrugged at MJ, who was giving him a bemused look. Emily hid a laugh behind her hand.

     “Sorry about that, everyone.” She said. “Friday, if you could alert Ms. Potts to a broken window in the east wing of the Avengers Museum, please?”

     “Ms. Potts has been informed of the damage.”

     “Was that Deadpool?” A girl asked, looking impressed. “And does he know Peter?”

     “That was him! Deadpool has been working closely with the Avengers in recent years, something most of us attribute to Spider-Man’s good influence. In fact, I’ve only met two people that Deadpool actually listens to – Spider-Man and Peter. I don’t quite understand how they do it.”

     Everyone turned their eyes to Peter.

     “Since when do you know Deadpool?” Harry, one of Peter’s friends from the decathlon team, asked incredulously.

     “Uh, Mr. Stark usually gives me the job of mending Deadpool’s suit after missions. We got talking, I guess?” Peter said slowly. It was technically the truth. Tony always gave Peter the job of wrangling Deadpool because the merc didn’t trust anyone else with his suit, or anything else about him. Of course, this came _after_ they’d become close friends (and later started dating), but Peter decided to leave that part out. His class looked appropriately impressed.

     They finished their tour of the museum with no further surprises, Peter finally allowing himself to let his guard down as it didn’t seem like his family would be causing any more trouble.

    

Emily led them out of the museum and towards the elevators. The elevator door opened to reveal a harassed-looking Clint, and Thor, who was grinning brightly. Clint blinked at the class for a moment, before dropping his shoulders.

     “I found Thor. He’s your problem now.” He said to Peter, walking off. Thor caught sight of Peter, and his smile brightened further.

     “Peter!” The man said, bounding over to crush Peter in a tight hug, that lifted him off the ground. Thor knew that Peter had strength that rivalled his own and had never been afraid of manhandling him (or handing him his ass during training sessions), but his hugs were still bone-crushing.

     Peter’s class were star-struck. Gwen, a fiery blonde (who Peter had once had an impressive crush on), was the first one brave enough to speak up.

     “What the fuck is Thor doing on earth?” She said, then blushed. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”

     Thor laughed. “I followed Loki. He came to Midgard to visit the Man of Spiders, and I decided it would be excellent fun to join him.”

     Steve had taken it upon himself to explain the concept of a secret identity to Thor, the first time he’d met Peter out of the Spider-Man suit. At first, Thor hadn’t understood, but when he found out it could put Peter in danger, he swore to keep the secret. He still slipped up, however, but not enough for anyone to put the pieces together. Peter and Thor had become close friends over Thor’s frequent visits to Earth. Eventually, the god had moved from ‘Mr. Thor’ to ‘Uncle Thor’, something he was extremely proud of. He’d boasted to Loki for weeks before Loki also became ‘Uncle Loki’.

     Emily broke the brief silence. “Mr. Thor, do you have time to answer a few questions, or do you need to find Spider-Man?”

     Thor glanced at Peter for a moment, worried. “Uh, I believe I must go. I was seeking out the Captain and the Man of Iron. Peter?”

     “They’ll be in the living room, I think.” Peter said, forgetting about his classmates. “I’m not sure where Loki is, I’m sorry.”

     Thor ruffled Peter’s hair fondly and turned to the rest of the class. “I’m afraid I must leave you. It’s been wonderful to meet Peter’s companions.” He scanned the crowd and waved. “Oh, hello again, MJ! I did not realise you were here! Lady Sif has asked me to tell you that she misses you dreadfully!”

     MJ, to her credit, didn’t look phased. She’d seen a lot of weird things being one of Peter’s closest friends, one of those things being her surprising friendship with the Asgardian warrior. She gave Thor a brief thumbs-up, trying to hide her smile in her book.

     Thor walked off, leaving the teenagers in stunned silence. Even Flash was in awe of the god. Emily guided the group into the the elevator, listening to the excited muttering with a smile.

     She took a moment to look at Peter. Emily was one of the higher-ups in the company, meaning she came into frequent contact with Tony Stark, and the rest of the Avengers. She wasn’t blind to how they treated Peter like he was their collective son. She was rather fond of the boy herself, seeing how he went out of his way to help everyone he could, and being amusing and intelligent to boot. She knew there was something odd about him, though. She caught him once in the hallway, carrying an injured Deadpool with ease as if he was a baby, not a fully-grown man, 200 pounds of pure muscle.

     Emily remembered an interaction she’d had with Peter, when she was a new employee and he was young, maybe 14 or 15. She worked in one of the labs at Stark Tower, and he sat quietly in the corner, watching her.

 

_“Can I help?”_

_Emily looked up in surprise. She’d been ignoring the kid, assuming that he was waiting for someone, but he was now watching over her shoulder. He looked out of place but didn’t seem to be a troublemaker. She raised her eyebrows._

_“It’s a little complicated, I’m afraid.” She said, gesturing to the prototype Stark Phone she was assembling. The boy shrugged._

_“You put that in the wrong place.”_

_“What?”_

_“You put the chip in the wrong place.” He said again. Emily looked down at what she was doing._

_“Oh shit!”_

_The kid laughed a little, before snapping his jaw shut and looking embarrassed. She quickly fixed her mistake and looked back up, to see he’d sat back down._

_“You know much about Stark technology, then--”_

_“Peter.”_

_“Hi, Peter. I’m Emily.”_

_“Hi. And yeah. I used to remodel old Stark Phones, that I found in the trash, but Mr. Stark says I should just ask him for parts instead of dumpster-diving.”_

_Emily looked up again, in shock that the teenager had direct interactions with Stark._

_“Great.” She said with a smile. “Could you tell me what I’m doing wrong here? The battery should be working, but it’s the thinner model and I can’t figure out why it’s not…” She trailed off, frowning down at the phone. Peter walked back over and examined the phone._

_“Here.” He said. With delicate fingers, he drew out a hair-thin copper wire, before discarding it. “It’s simple logic, right? Scale it down, and there are going to be unnecessary parts. This is arc reactor tech, so not all of these particular wires,” He gestured to a group of wires, “Are going to connect to the battery anymore.”_

_“Who are you, kid?” Emily asked quietly. Peter’s face fell._

_“I’m no one.” He said. “Not really.”_

_Emily could see the kid was troubled. She gave him a sympathetic smile. “Want to talk about it?”_

_“My dads. My, uh, adopted dads, that is, are fighting really badly at the moment.” Peter said quietly, his voice cracking a little. “I’m scared that one of them is going to do something drastic. They aren’t listening to me, and I don’t want to pick a side, and—”_

_“Peter. Slow down, kid.” Emily said. “Do you think your dads really love each other?”_

_“Oh, I know they do.” Peter cracked a smile. “This isn’t about that. I think they’re both scared.”_

_“Of what?”_

_“Of losing the people they care about. I don’t know how to make them see that though. They never listen to me, Emily!”_

_Emily put down the tools she was holding. “Sometimes you have to make them listen. They love you, so they’ll pay attention whether they want to or not.” She grinned. “Sometimes you gotta raise a little hell, kid.”_

_Peter grinned as well, brushing away a few tears. He opened his mouth to say something, when the lab door burst open._

_“Peter! There you are!” Tony Stark said. Emily froze, intimidated. Peter rushed over to the man. “Next time, at least tell Friday you’re leaving the penthouse. You’re impossible.”_

_Peter and Tony Stark walked out together, Peter flashing Emily a final smile, leaving her wondering who the hell the kid was._

She saw him a lot more after that interaction, sometimes helped him on projects and sometimes got his help on her projects.

      Emily shook herself out of her thoughts as the elevator opened again. She led the teenagers through the lobby, where they were told to stop, huddled in a group. The teenagers talked amongst themselves whilst Emily spoke to someone over the phone.

     The door slid open, and two men walked in. They were followed by a harried-looking blonde woman. One of the men, a blind man with a cane, paused and cocked his head. He turned his head towards Peter. The other man followed the blind man’s gaze.

     “Hey Karen, it’s Matt’s kid!” Foggy Nelson exclaimed, making his way over and ruffling Peter’s hair. Peter raised an eyebrow at him. “Shouldn’t you be in school, bud?”

     “He’s on a school trip, Foggy.” Matt said, making his way over. “He wouldn’t stop complaining about it.” He said, with a raised brow aimed for Peter.

     He blushed, but grinned when Matt raised his fist reluctantly. “Team Red?”

     Peter bumped his fist. “Team Red!”

The rest of Peter’s class looked lost. Karen tugged at Foggy’s collar. “We have a meeting with Ms. Potts like, right now, in case you two forgot why we’re here. Lovely to see you, Peter.”

     The two lawyers walked off, dragged away by an exasperated Karen. Flash smirked. “Figures the only person that’d want to be friends with Puny Parker is a blind guy. Is he deaf, too, or does he just not listen when you talk, Penis?”

     From the way Matt’s shoulders tensed from the other side of the room, Peter figured the Daredevil had heard Flash’s insults. Still, Matt followed Karen and Foggy out the room, and Peter figured that Flash had dodged a bullet.

     Emily was still glued to her phone, the conversation seeming to get more heated, and she didn’t notice as the elevator doors opened again. Peter’s class milled around, spread around the foyer, chatting and poking at displays.

     Tony Stark walked out first, followed by an angry-looking Strange. Tony made a beeline for Peter, where he checked the boy over quickly. “You’re okay?” Tony asked. Peter nodded, too confused to answer coherently.

     Strange raised an eyebrow at Tony, who shrugged. Strange sighed. “Look, Tony. Loki isn’t technically… dangerous, currently. He’s not going to hurt Peter, you’re just being overprotective.”

     From behind them, there was a startled yell. The three whirled around, to see a boy dangling by his ankle high in the air. His ankle was surrounded by a bright green mist.

     “Flash!” Peter gasped. Tony cursed and turned to Peter.

     “Is he the boy that bruised you?”

     “Yeah, he… wait, how do you know that?” Peter frowned.

     “Not important.” Tony shook his head. “The issue is that you have this uncanny ability to make people want to protect you, kiddo.”

     Strange had already moved away, attempting to help Flash down. The magic was strong, though, and Flash was being thrown around as he was moved out of Strange’s reach. He was cursing up a storm, and Mr. Harrington looked like he was about to have an aneurysm.

     Tony ran forward as well, and Peter found himself suddenly caught in a strong pair of arms. “Wade.” He said, exasperated. “Does this have something to do with you?”

     All he got in return was a chuckle, as he watched Tony and Strange tugging at Flash’s arms, as the boy screamed in terror. Peter slipped out of Wade’s arms.

     “Loki!” Peter yelled, as loud as he could. Everyone turned towards him. “Put him down!”

     There was a beat of silence.

     Flash suddenly dropped to the floor. He was caught by Strange’s magic just before he hit the ground, but no one helped him up. In the centre of the room, Loki appeared in a flash of green. He strode towards Peter confidently, grinning like a maniac. Peter tried to stare him down but fought back a slight smile in the face of his friend. Loki stopped a few steps away from Peter.

     “Was the punishment satisfactory, young Peter?” Loki said, quirking a brow. Peter shook his head.

     “This was all unnecessary, Loki. You could’ve seriously hurt him!” Peter said. Loki’s smile dropped a little, before he grinned blindingly.

      “I was going to kill him, but your boyfriend advised against it. Odd, I believe he wanted to murder the man just as much as I did.” Loki shrugged. “Regardless, I’m in Midgard for a few days. You told me you’d show me New York, and Wade offered to accompany us.” From over Peter’s shoulder, Wade nodded.

     Peter paused. “That sounds amazing, Loki, but right now probably isn’t the best time to talk about this.” He said. “In fact, I think you should probably get out of here.”

     Loki smirked again. He turned towards Strange and Tony, who were storming towards them. Tony, surprisingly, didn’t look that angry. Neither did Strange, but he did look exasperated when Loki vanished.

     “It was an illusion. Figures.” Strange said, turning dramatically and striding out the room. Flash was clearly fine, sat on the floor with his arms crossed, looking more like a disgruntled child than the senior that he was. Tony glared at Wade, but ruffled Peter’s hair.

     “I’ve got to go, but I’ll see you later, Pete. Sam wants a Smash rematch, and I want to watch him get destroyed.” Tony paused. “Why he thinks he could beat someone who’s superpowers are _super reflexes_ in a video game,I have no idea, but it’s fun to watch. I gotta go. Love you, kiddo.”

     Tony left the room, dragging Wade behind him, and left Peter awkwardly trying to avoid eye contact with his classmates. Mr. Harrington had finished talking to Emily, who looked apologetic but surprisingly calm. She shot Peter a wink.

     “Why are all the superheroes talking to _Peter_?” Someone asked. Peter flushed under the attention.

     “Probably because they recognise me?” Peter said, voice strained. “I mean, I work with them sometimes?”

     “Yeah, bullshit.” Harry said. “They all treat you like- their kid, or something.”

     Peter cleared his throat sheepishly. “Yeah, about that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope this was at least slightly as fun to read as it was to write! It ended up waaaay longer than I intended it to be, oops. I just love writing about our Friendly Neighbourhood Spooderman and his disaster of a life. Parker Luck(tm) strikes again!
> 
> I'm working on another Peter-centric fic, but this one much longer, if anyone cares. 
> 
> side note-- I'm hype af for Captain Marvel and here's your reminder to go support the movie!


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